This is ** retuning your call. I’m calling about the problem that you brought up during our staff meeting. As you said, a lot of visitors who come came to our hospital have lost their personal belongings. This month, 10 people lost their items and all of those items never turned out up at lost and found center.

There are a lot of possibilities that visitors might stole steal other people’s belongings, so we need to look for a way to solve this problem.

-> 전체 답변중에서 문제점 요약부분이 너무 많은 부분을 차지합니다. 이 부분을 줄이고 솔루션에 더 시간을 할애하는 것이 좋겠습니다!

After looking into the situation, I came up with following solution.

Why don’t we install security camera all areas about in the hospital. I’m sure that it will be very helpful for tracking the lost items and protect protecting -> helpful for 에 맞게 수정되어야합니다. visitor’s belongings from other people. So…. 

※ 이 게시글은 토익스피킹 점수예측서비스 참여자 답변에 대한 1:1 첨삭입니다.